Prizes practical blockbuster filmmaking, big star performances and Scorsese-era craft; an unabashed defender of late-period Ridley Scott. Dislikes messy modern blockbuster scripts and over-reliance on CGI. A sucker for Denzel and for horror and sci-fi legacy sequels.
Stances
Was entertained but rates Gladiator II well below the original
Denzel Washington is the reason to rewatch it
The film wanted the original's pyramid structure without doing something different
Wanted Gladiator II to have the guts of Before Midnight
Humor: Mock-aggrieved nitpicking and tangents about food, friends and money.
In their words
“I was entertained.” (0:13:17)
“I'm mostly in the bag for everything he does.” (1:12:12)
The most openly critical voice on Babylon: admires the virtuosity but says the opening party rings hollow, and that the film holds together less well than he remembered. Relates to P.J. Byrne's character. Fan of scene-level filmmaking, Brad Pitt's persona work, golf and public courses, and menswear (J. Crew, Uniqlo). Sucker for bits like Trump impressions and Zyn.
Stances
Babylon is a collection of great scenes that does not quite congeal
Hive-adjacent, not in the hive
Seeing movies in theaters with a crowd adds to the experience
Humor: Slow-burn self-deprecation and bit commitment (the Zyn pouch, Trump voice, the J. Crew detour).
In their words
“and it rings hollow to me, which is perhaps the point” (0:26:34)
“The scenes the individual scenes are popping, but the actual movie is maybe not holding together as well as it did in the theater that I remember.” (2:12:00)
Heat is his number one and Manhunter his yearly rewatch; likes messy reclamation projects like Miami Vice. Loves Ferrari and thinks Mann went out on a high note. Big on the 'fusion' of classical and digital Mann.
Stances
Ferrari is a deeply satisfying film in his top five of the year
Miami Vice's mess is the point
Mann's themes are men and their obsessions
Humor: Grand and self-mocking, with extended comic metaphors.
In their words
“I'll never give birth, but it's the closest. It's what I imagine it's like.” (0:03:50)
Loves being manipulated by filmmakers and Fincher's subjective craft; adores the Smiths-as-joke and the sound design. Reads the film as the ultimate control-freak movie and Swinton's character as the life the killer could not have. Dislikes nothing here and calls it possibly his favorite movie of the year.
Stances
Fassbender's killer is an unreliable narrator lying to himself
The film is about the fallacy of control
The killer kills Swinton because she has a normal life
Humor: Excitable and self-aware, jokes about shaking in his chair and fashion and food habits.
In their words
“I love being manipulated by filmmakers.” (0:05:42)
“I think he killed her because no loose ends.” (0:44:38)
Loves big-screen Hollywood entertainment and communal theatrical experiences, with a horror streak (Barbarian, Speak No Evil). Loves Cate Blanchett, Martin McDonagh and Top Gun: Maverick as his number one. Admits being a little embarrassed by how populist his list is.
Stances
Hollywood theatrical experiences fired him up this year
Speak No Evil is the most effective horror film of the year
Top Gun: Maverick delivered after two years of hype and is better than the original
Humor: Boisterous and profane; fond of analogies like Stairway to Heaven and quoting Boogie Nights.
In their words
“I'm almost like at once defiantly excited about my list, but a little bit embarrassed by it.” (0:23:50)
“And it still fucking rocks.” (1:26:04)
“it's probably the most effective horror movie I've seen this year.” (0:48:20)
Loves The Firm, Collateral, Edge of Tomorrow and a Hollywood ensemble movie; thinks Born is Cruise's best performance and Jerry Maguire his most appealing.
Stances
Pushes for The Firm
Cruise now treats himself as the Rock
Fallout is exceptional
Humor: Big physical impressions and dad-style tangents; keeps asking about the rules.
In their words
“I am going to say the firm just because I also think that that is in a lot of ways, like among the best casts he's ever been a part of.” (0:40:33)
He loves cheap, anxiety-heavy genre pieces, B-minus horror movies and anything that makes him squeeze the popcorn box. He picked events that freaked him out over big hits, leaving Get Out and the Blumhouse hits off his top five. He can't stand Black Swan-style foot-breaking discomfort and doubts that Cabin in the Woods is scary at all.
Stances
Horror should dominate the audience
Genre lines (thriller, horror, terror) matter
Directors drift away from horror naturally
The B-minus horror movie is the best B movie
Humor: Cheerful self-deprecation and tangents, such as confessing to spoiling Cabin in the Woods in an NBA post.
In their words
“The B minus version of a horror movie is my favorite kind of B minus movie.” (0:34:47)
“I like that, I like feeling things.” (0:52:03)
“I spoiled Cabin in the Woods in like an NBA blog post for like 1000s of people.” (0:41:38)
A TV-first critic who came to Disney through Marvel and Star Wars rather than the legacy titles, and who loves teen entertainment and character actors such as Mark Maron. Dislikes late revival movies and fan-service compression; a sucker for crowd-roar moments like the Endgame hammer.
Stances
Will send his streaming money elsewhere than Disney+
Skeptical of Eternals and of revival movies
Counterprogramming may be dead
Moviegoing is about circumstances and shared reactions
Humor: Wry and conversational, setting up riffs such as the 1992 podcast called Smells Like Teen Spirit.
In their words
“And I will be sending my streaming money elsewhere.” (0:02:08)
“I think he takes his craft really seriously.” (0:19:29)
Reveres Spielberg's craft (lighting, camera movement, editing, music) and calls him a film school; picks Empire of the Sun as a personal favorite. Loves rewatchable, tightly made movies like Jaws, Raiders, and Jurassic Park and likes Munich, A.I., and Tom Cruise in War of the Worlds. Cold on Spielberg's explicit kids' movies.
Stances
Spielberg is his film school
Jaws is the perfect movie
Spielberg's kid-targeted films (Tintin, BFG) don't work
Munich's opening is the best
Humor: Warm, enthusiastic riffing and impressions; walks the line between sincere and goofy.
In their words
“It's my film school.” (0:03:04)
“Jaws is a perfect movie.” (0:35:06)
Their shows' recurring bits
Running bits, not opinions; a critic read aloud is cited, not present.
The Big Picture
Drafts: Hosts and guests draft films in rounds; every pick is a recommendation with an argument.
Hall of Fame: A star's or director's best, ranked and argued.
Countdowns: Ranked lists, top five or top ten.
Blank Check with Griffin & David
The box office game: Guessing the film's opening weekend and what it was up against.
The sung theme: "Blank Check with Griffin and David", sung; the transcriber garbles it.
The Rewatchables
Apex Mountain: The moment a star peaks; where on the mountain a performance sits.
Who Won the Movie: The hosts name the person who came out of the film best off.
The Ebert review: Roger Ebert's original review and star rating read aloud. Ebert is cited, never on the show.
Casting what-ifs: Who was almost cast, or who should have been.
Most rewatchable scene: The scene each host would stop on while flipping channels.
Aged best / aged worst: What holds up and what does not.
Picking Nits: The little things in a film the hosts love that they don't think totally work: the nits.
Double feature: The film each host would pair it with; a programming pick.
Their claims
Showing 601–700 of 854 claims.
unmapped (same-year coincidence):
Mission: Impossible → The English Patient.
Binoche/Scott Thomas would have starred in two big 1996 films had Binoche taken Claire.
“this is the same year as the English patient, and that would have just been a funny coincidence.”
people (regular collaborator):
Stephen Burum → Brian De Palma.
Cinematographer Burum is named as a De Palma collaborator with hits such as Rumble Fish and The Outsiders.
“What about Stephen Burham, who's the palm is... Stephen Burham hits.”
unmapped (audience anticipation):
The Departed → Gangs of New York.
Simmons felt the same big-names anticipation for Gangs of New York as for The Departed.
“the other time I remember feeling it was gangs, gangs of New York in 2002”
unmapped (too satisfying):
The Departed → No Country for Old Men.
Seeing something that is exactly what you want, like this cast or No Country, can feel weirdly unsatisfying.
“I had it too when I saw No Country for Old Men because I love that book so much.”
career (career peak):
The Departed → Boogie Nights.
1997 was a better year for Leo, Damon, Nicholson and Wahlberg than 2006: Boogie Nights, Good Will Hunting, Titanic, As Good as It Gets.
verdict (favorite performances):
Leonardo DiCaprio → The Wolf of Wall Street.
This, Wolf and Django are Ryan's three favorite Leo performances, not The Revenant.
“I would say this Wolf and Django are my 3 favorite Leo performances.”
unmapped (greatest hits):
The Departed → Goodfellas.
Ryan says The Departed recycles Scorsese's camera moves from his career like a greatest-hits album, with no single shot to rival the Copacabana tracking shot or the Goodfellas freeze frames.
“there's not one single shot in the departed that you would put up against like the Copacabana tracking shot or any of the slow-mo freeze frame stuff and Goodfellas or Raging Bull”
what-if (what-if):
Martin Sheen → J. Gianoni.
A host suggests the production should have had the accent coach voice Martin Sheen's lines while cutting to reaction shots.
“get, you know, JG and Oni in there to do his accent”
unmapped (real-life model):
Jack Nicholson → Whitey Bulger.
Nicholson is basically playing Whitey Bulger, a Boston crime lord who would not refuse a Red Sox hat.
unmapped (creep vs sweetheart):
Matt Damon → The Martian.
Damon's best work is the creeps like Ripley, and Ryan prefers that to his America's sweetheart phase in The Martian.
“Matt Damon's best performances are always the one where he plays the creeps, like Ripley”
people (same actor, different result):
The Departed → A Few Good Men.
Nicholson nailed every line of Sorkin's watertight script in A Few Good Men but is all over the place in The Departed.
“he nails every line of Sorkin dialogue. It's like watertight script.”
unmapped (Whitey Bulger movie):
The Departed → The Irishman.
Scorsese's next gangster movie with De Niro, Pacino and Pesci would be de-aged digitally and paid for by Netflix.
unmapped (perfect vs rewatchable):
The Departed → No Country for Old Men.
No Country is note perfect but he has watched it far fewer times than The Departed, because flawed movies leave room to check out and ask questions.
“I have watched it 80% less than the departed because the departed, it actually feels like a roller coaster ride when you're on it.”
craft (crafted vs improvised):
The Departed → Heat.
Heat is long and full of huge stars like this, but Mann's decisions were all considered while The Departed feels like flying by the seat of its pants.
“I felt like heat was crafted. Every decision he makes is really well thought out”
people (performance comp):
Austin Abrams → Michael J. Fox.
Abrams recalls Michael J. Fox in Back to the Future: spirited, snarky, sweet, outlandish situations, gumption.
“the actor that Abrams reminded me of most is Michael J. Fox and Back to the Future.”
lineage (influence):
Resident Evil → John Carpenter.
Carpenter looms over the movie; it sits in a lineage with Romero, 28 Days Later, Alien, Cronenberg.
“It's very obvious the way that Carpenter looms over a movie like this.”
contrast (structure contrast):
Resident Evil → Weapons.
Weapons chopped the story across perspectives; Resident Evil is linear through one guy's eyes, but both make you want to recap the beats.
contrast (contrast):
Evil Dead II → Scary Movie.
Evil Dead 2 fuses comedy with horror history rather than upending it; making fun of horror usually leads to Scary Movie, not an actually funny and scary film.
“making fun of horror usually leads you down the road to scary movie.”
craft (structural comp):
Resident Evil → Get Out.
Chris cites Get Out's opening lonely-road accident as a box-checking scary space like the film's opening.
“get out very famously, more or less opens with an accident like that on a lonely road”
industry (box-office comp):
Resident Evil → Obsession.
Obsession was also disgusting and a huge sensation, showing gross horror can have a high ceiling.
“obsession is also disgusting at times, and it is a huge sensation.”
career (career-position comp):
Resident Evil → Jackie Brown.
Resident Evil is to Cregger as Jackie Brown (third film, stripped-down, source material) was to Tarantino.
unmapped (audience-clout comp):
Zach Cregger → Christopher Nolan.
Cregger has already done what Nolan did, smashing through online fan concern-trolling.
“he's already done what Nolan did, which is apparently just like smashed through the, like, fake concern control online.”
career (career parallel):
Zach Cregger → Jordan Peele.
Cregger's first three films resemble Peele's: a short window, escalating ambition, genre with Carpenter influence; both come from sketch comedy.
“The thing that it reminds me of the most is Jordan Peele.”
unmapped (near-miss production):
Jordan Peele → Weapons.
Peele reportedly wanted to produce Weapons or Barbarian and changed management companies when he did not.
“Peel wanted to produce, was it weapons or barbarian?”
unmapped (respectability):
Resident Evil → Weapons.
Weapons made a witch-flesh-tearing movie respectable; Resident Evil may do the same for movies like it.
“this is like gonna kind of make movies like this respectable.”
lineage (adaptation hope):
Alex Garland → Elden Ring.
Garland loves Elden Ring and that is why he is adapting it; the lesson may be to give great filmmakers license.
“Garland loves Elden Ring, and that's why he's doing the movie.”
craft (ending montage):
Babylon → Avatar: The Way of Water.
Chris thinks it cheap that Babylon's montage of cinema moments includes Avatar, which Sean defends as part of cinema's evolution.
“It feels cheap that he would put that movie in the like montage of the greatest film moments ever”
people (performance):
Kerry Condon → The Banshees of Inisherin.
Chris says Keoghan's longing for Condon's character stayed with him and calls Keoghan's best performance there.
“the underlying plot about Keegan's longing for the Carrie Condon. character is the thing that really stayed with me.”
lineage (homage):
Ambulance → Heat.
Chris says the first half of Ambulance is Michael Bay trying to make Heat, before the second half becomes a great chase movie.
“The 1st half of this movie is basically like Michael Bay being like, I want to make heat.”
unmapped (reboot):
Confess, Fletch → Fletch.
Chris describes it as a riff on the long-promised Fletch franchise reboot, with Jon Hamm taking the role Chevy Chase made iconic.
“Chevy Chase did an iconic turn as a Fletch character, a journalist come detective in Los Angeles.”
theme (era vibe):
Emily the Criminal → Straight Time.
Chris says Emily the Criminal has a bit of the vibe of 70s character-portrait crime movies like Straight Time.
“a little bit of a vibe of like 70s movies, like straight time, where it's just like a very, very cool character portrait”
fun, about
Mission: Impossible:
The 32-minute Prague opening act ends with a fade to black after Cruise jumps through the aquarium and escapes Kittridge.
“that is presented as a 32 minute opening act, it even has a fade to black after Tom Cruise jumps through Aquarium”
fun, about
Mission: Impossible:
Casting what-ifs: Juliette Binoche turned down Claire so as not to be known for blockbusters; Peter Graves and Martin Landau passed after reading the script. Early drafts had sex scenes cut and a kiss in the trailer that is not in the film.
“There's actually a kiss in the trailer that they don't ever have.”
fun, about
Mission: Impossible:
Early Huyck/Katz draft opened with the original IMF team, including Peter Graves, killed on a mission, leaving Cruise to solve who did it.
“They were all to be killed, and that would leave Cruz behind to solve the, you know, who the mystery of who killed his his original team.”
fun, about
Jon Voight:
Looks fitter than ever on the train in the parachute suit; hosts debate whether it is a stunt double. Jim Phelps shooting Claire first makes no sense.
“I just didn't quite understand why Jim had to shoot Claire.”
fun, about
Brian De Palma:
Apex Mountain for De Palma goes to The Untouchables; for Ving Rhames it is not MI. Nobody gets MI as their apex; Czerny's is Clear and Present Danger.
fun, about
Mission: Impossible:
It marked the start of the Cruise/Wagner producing partnership (which later ended after taking over United Artists) and the end of Voight's good-movie run.
“It is the beginning of the Wagner cruise producing partnership, which is very powerful for a time and then ends quite badly when they take over United artists.”
fun, about
Martin Scorsese:
Scorsese won Best Picture and Director for it as a perceived make-up Oscar in a weak year; Wahlberg was the only cast member nominated.
“It was just a really, really, really, really bad movie year.”
fun, about
Jack Nicholson:
Nicholson reportedly wanted a prostitute scene with a dildo, was talked out of it, but kept the prop and ad-libbed it into the movie theater scene.
“he had some crazy hooker scene with dildos that he wanted to shoot and they talked him out of it”
fun, about
Ray Winstone:
The cranberry juice scene: Leo smashes a glass on a guy's head, then Winstone steps in and declares who you can and can't hit. Called a perfect movie scene.
fun, about
The Departed:
Ryan's overarching theory: Leo and Damon are two ways of living in America, compartmentalized ambition vs vulnerability, and America destroys both while guys like Dignam survive.
“either way, even no matter which road you choose, America will destroy you.”
fun, about
Noah Baumbach:
Leaving Netflix after four features in eight years for Warner Bros.' Clockwork; Sean wants to see directors out of the Netflix cocoon.
“there is a Netflix cocoon around a group of directors”
fun, about
Austin Abrams:
Reacts to killing like a player in a video game, not like a traumatized man; Chris compares it to playing Max Payne with caffeine and cigarettes.
“I've had 4 coffees over the course of the day and now I've had 3 beers”
fun, about
Resident Evil:
Brian shoots the bitten girl who turns into a lizard-footed tentacle monster, rather than becoming Lone Wolf and Cub; Sean wanted to applaud as the father of a daughter.
fun, about
Resident Evil:
The rat sequence: a huge zombie explodes into hundreds of rats; Chris's rat fear traces to New York apartment mice, and he is grateful they did not form a rat king.
fun, about
Resident Evil:
The maternity ward with a glowing bubble that Sean compared to a rising sourdough loaf, and which bursts into a log flume of blood.
fun, about
Resident Evil:
The ending has no happy ending: Abrams becomes a tentacled monster waving as a National Guard helicopter closes in, then a cut to black.
“this guy waving his tentacles in the air screaming as the National Guard helicopter is bearing down on him.”
fun, about
Resident Evil:
Box office tracking is $80 million worldwide for the opening weekend, huge for horror; Chris thinks $300 million domestic is possible.
“can this movie like realistically make $300000000 in America, I think it can.”
fun, about
Top Gun: Maverick:
Chris says the last 30 minutes, until the final 10, are perfect cinema, from leaving the battleship through the coffin run.
“the last 30 minutes up until the last 10 minutes are perfect cinema”
fun, about
The Batman:
Chris picks it because his favorite meme of the century is Paul Dano losing his mind behind the Arkham cell; Dano as the Riddler is a gift.
fun, about
Ambulance:
First half is Michael Bay doing Heat; the second half is one of the best chase movies of the century, with great defibrillator work.
“the 2nd half of this movie is one of the best chase movies that you will see this century.”
fun, about
Goodfellas:
Chris's first overall pick; Amanda says she would have taken it too, and Chris admits he never saw it in the theater, just on video soon after.
fun, about
The Cook, the Thief, His Wife & Her Lover:
Chris glimpsed the Gambon-Mirren dinner-table scene as a kid and his dad told him to just watch Goodfellas again.
fun, about
Gladiator:
Joaquin Phoenix's rise, Crowe's peak and patching together Oliver Reed's performance after his death made it lightning in a bottle.
“Like, you know, being able to patch together the Oliver Reed performance, even though he passes away during production.”
fun, about
Gladiator II:
The CGI baboons, rhinoceros and sharks were the least successful set pieces; the intimate fights, like the emperor's party, worked best.
fun, about
The Texas Chain Saw Massacre 2:
Chris pitches Part 2 as a slapstick comedy with Dennis Hopper, to be watched back to back with the original.
“You should watch them both back to back, but start at midnight.”
fun, about
Before Midnight:
Chris loves it as a brutal punch in the gut about long relationships; the Before trilogy is among his three favorite trilogies.
“this is such a punch in the gut, and I love that.”
fun, about
Babylon:
Critic's view of the closing montage: you can feel Chazelle searching for the ending in real time and deciding to throw in The Matrix and Avatar.
“And then he's like, well, I guess I'm just gonna like put the Matrix and Avatar in here and really go big.”
fun, about
David Fincher:
The Q&A team (Klyce, Messerschmidt, Baxter) answered every question with 'that was David's idea.' Walker said Fincher walked him through the whole movie when pitching it.
“every time they got asked a question, they would be like, that's David.”
fun, about
The Killer:
Scene to look for: the first hit scored to How Soon Is Now. Sound design flips between full stereo song and the song in the killer's headphones, pulling it away right at the Johnny Marr crescendo, refusing the viewer the cool-song kill.
“I was waiting my entire life to see someone get killed to how soon is now.”
fun, about
The Killer:
Chris Ryan's guess: the killer's favorite Smiths record is Hatful of Hollow or compilation 'Louder Than Bombs', not The Queen Is Dead; favorite Sub Pop band Mudhoney, maybe Tad.
fun, about
The Killer:
Product placement is deployed so precisely (the Amazon lockers, McDonald's, WeWork) that the hosts laughed at every logo; the film also makes a clinic of consumer-culture satire.
“every time there was a logo in this movie. I laughed because they were deployed so well.”
fun, about
Barbarian:
Chris says seeing it was like going to the movies in the 90s, knowing nothing and having your mind blown; Amanda has not seen it and threatens to call it mid.
“going to see movies in the 90s where you just don't know anything about it.”
fun, about
The Banshees of Inisherin:
Chris calls it Martin McDonagh's treatise on friendship and a meaningful life; his wife was not convinced by the screener he brought upstairs.
“To me, it's like a Martin McDonough's treatise on friendship, and it's his treatise on what makes a meaningful life.”
fun, about
Tár:
Chris watched three times: frustrated by the ending first, a blast second, and by the third he called it one of the great ones. He notes it will make under five million dollars.
fun, about
Top Gun: Maverick:
Chris saw it twice in theaters, twice on planes, once with two ex-naval pilots doing YouTube commentary, plus clips, and says it still rocks. A guy in the audience shouted a line of praise to Jon Hamm at the end.
“I'm never going to forget like the screenings I saw this, especially the dude at the end of this movie who went, great job, John Hamm.”
fun, about
Top Gun: Maverick:
Chris says the Who training sequence is what the song is for, not car commercials, and that the film is the one-in-137 time Stairway to Heaven's second half hits.
fun, about
A Few Good Men:
Chris points out that Cruise whispers his questions to Jessup in a courtroom where a jury would never hear, which only makes sense because it is a movie, though the script was written for the stage.
“there's multiple moments where he just starts whispering questions at him.”
fun, about
Mission: Impossible III:
Watch the scene where Philip Seymour Hoffman counts down with a gun to Keri Russell's head while Cruise says tell me what you need.
“Watch the scene where Philip Seymour Hoffman counts down while putting having a gun to carry Russell's head.”
fun, about
Jack Reacher:
Cruise is 5'8 and Reacher in the book is 6'6; Reacher gets built up like the Predator and then it's Tom Cruise in a leather jacket.
“Tom Cruise is 5'8 and Jack Reacher in the book is like 6'6.”
fun, about
Midsommar:
Chris's summary: Aster stuffed him in a bear carcass and played Jonny Greenwood strings until his eardrums exploded (composer named as said).
“Ari Astor stuffed me in a fucking bear carcass and played Johnny Greenwood strings in my, until my eardrums explode.”
fun, about
Unfriended:
The whole film plays on a laptop screen; Chris says it exhausts you because your brain tracks four panes of information at once.
“your brain can process 4 quadrants of information and can actually like listen to people while also watching a mouse clicking over different apps”
fun, about
Chris Ryan's top five:
Chris counts down his five best (Unfriended, You're Next, The Invitation, It Follows, Green Room), picking events that freaked him out rather than a bulletproof list.
“I did really pick horror movies that I thought were events.”
fun, about
You're Next:
An arrow through the window ends the first victim at a family reunion, in a mumblegore cast of Ti West, Joe Swanberg and Amy Seimetz.
fun, about
Marvel / Eternals:
Spider-Man gets a joke as a mythology: it is based on puberty, which everyone experiences, unlike the space-alien mythologies.
“Spider-Man is based on puberty, a mythology that we all have to experience.”
fun, about
Scary Stories to Tell in the Dark:
Chris campaigns for Austin Abrams, a teen-entertainment veteran who barely does interviews and takes his craft seriously, and will star in a Less Than Zero reboot.
fun, about
Godzilla: King of the Monsters:
A host was the King of the Monsters meme lord for two months and still never saw it; nobody they know did either.
fun, about
Star Wars: Episode IV – A New Hope:
Lucas and Spielberg each thought the other's film would do better and bet back-end points; Spielberg owns a piece of Star Wars.
“now he owns a small piece of the Lucas Empire because he won that wager.”