Producer present in the room; a lifelong Indiana Jones fan raised on cable showings and the computer games, drawn to the franchise's bones, dust and a hero who is both bad boy and egghead.
Stances
Indy is an amalgam of dusty explorer, bad boy and egghead
Bones are a signature motif
Humor: Short, earnest asides that the hosts tease and nickname.
In their words
“I am a big fan of Indiana Jones.” (1:42:03)
“But I would say for me, origin wise, this is like major bone core.” (1:43:17)
The producer, in the room for the viewing. He seems bored, paces, and wants the film to end. He is not a big fan of the film's action either, and is the one asked to bring out bootleg toys.
Stances
Impatient with the film
Humor: Mostly reacts; the hosts joke that he's pacing like a dad at the Super Bowl.
In their words
“Ben is literally pacing around the room.” (1:23:27)
Producer who picked the film as a comfort watch; read the novel and manga and prepared a research dossier. Loves the practical production design and the farmhouse. Is a sucker for J Squad.
Stances
The film is a great adaptation of the light novel
Comfort film because it captures depression and grind
The ending and farmhouse are perfect
Humor: Earnest enthusiasm and self-deprecating dossier jokes.
The producer in the room, a big Lynch devotee who's ready to go on this ride. Feels deep wavelength compatibility with Lynch and likes the film's weirdness. Fidgets with a slinky during the outro.
Stances
Lynch is 'my guy'
Eraserhead is a natural Hosley-canon text
Humor: Deadpan interjections and physical bits like the slinky.
In their words
“I'm I'm so ready to just go on this ride.” (1:23:41)
“There's a lot of wavelength compatibility. Oh, yeah.” (1:23:37)
The producer in the room, usually quiet and kept to the clock; offers a short, warm take late in the episode. Likes the film as a comfort movie. Is teased for his old island line about A Simple Plan.
Stances
Gone Girl is a great beach-house movie
Keeps the running time honest
Humor: Understated; one-line observations that land after being asked.
In their words
“We are at 2 hours and 43 minutes.” (2:37:07)
“I think this is a great beach house movie.” (2:59:12)
“The Ben Hosley story, of course, the what is you? If I was in this movie, it would have ended with me owning an island, of course.” (0:36:12)
Producer in the room; saw the Swedish films first with his parents and was loyal to them; keeps pitching witch hackers. Skeptical of an American remake.
Stances
Prefers the Swedish originals
the American version was unnecessary.
Humor: Quiet deadpan interjections; the butt of the others' bits.
In their words
“I had, though, seen the Swedish film.” (0:26:01)
“I'm not going to watch an American version.” (0:26:42)
“I think that there should be witch hackers in movies where they literally manipulate the computer through spell.” (1:20:25)
Producer in the room; keeps the room honest on facts and gets pulled into jokes. Dislikes Facebook and keeps only a dummy account to sync a mobile game.
Stances
Facebook is mostly bad now
Blue is a respectable sour candy
Humor: Quiet, deadpan interjections that land late.
In their words
“Well, Ben Mesrich, the writer of the book that dumb money is based on producer Ben speaking here.” (0:13:40)
“I'll try logging in on my Sniffin Pumin account that once again,” (2:55:43)
Little is said about his taste in this episode. As producer he is the one in the room, the object of the Fashion Week banter and the closing safety note to listeners.
Humor: Gets the final aside of the episode and the target of the others' jokes.
In their words
“Yeah, just last thing is, um, hey, uh, listeners, look both ways when you're crossing the street.” (2:07:52)
Producer and the group's music scholar: Bob Dylan, Nine Inch Nails, industrial. Loves the Stones; hates the Doors. Picked many of the dumb videos and annotated the spreadsheet.
Stances
The Doors are the worst band
Stones are better for continuing to make music
Has never seen Dirty Dancing
Humor: Deadpan spreadsheet notes like 'another gross, horny selection'.
In their words
“It says another gross, horny selection.” (0:34:59)
The producer in the room. A true believer who rewatched the film hundreds of times, shoplifted the DVD as a kid, loved the vandalism over the fighting, and prefers the Chemical Brothers to the Dust Brothers. Gets drawn into the anarchy bit.
Stances
A genuine Fight Club kid
Wanted the vandalism, not the fighting
Willing to take the England bit too far
Humor: Deadpan performer of the bit with a straight face.
In their words
“I've watched this movie 100s.” (0:25:36)
“I fully accept this invitation to take things too far.” (2:45:30)
“I am a huge Chemical Brothers guy at this time.” (2:24:18)
The producer in the room. Voted for the film early (the hosts say he loved it); a Highlander head who says he'd call it a VHS classic. Barely speaks in this transcript.
Producer in the room. The others say the film has a Benny aesthetic (industrial, early-90s, aggressive); he has kept his childhood Predator toys. He did not need more time with this movie. Attribution is inferred.
Stances
He did not need another viewing of Alien 3
Wants more dripping
Humor: Deadpan and literal.
In their words
“I didn't need more time with this movie.” (0:18:30)
The producer, in the room; loves bones, chaos and crugs but balks at toys that bite. Happy to receive a wooden duck with bullet holes or a shrunken head.
Stances
Would accept Jack's Christmas presents if they did not attack him
Hasn't seen The Beverly Hillbillies
Humor: Dry one-liners when asked directly.
In their words
“If I got a video game system and then it bit me, I don't know if I'd be into it.” (1:52:14)
Their shows' recurring bits
Running bits, not opinions; a critic read aloud is cited, not present.
Blank Check with Griffin & David
The box office game: Guessing the film's opening weekend and what it was up against.
The sung theme: "Blank Check with Griffin and David", sung; the transcriber garbles it.
Their claims
Showing 1–34 of 34 claims.
contrast (authorship contrast):
Michael Mann → Marvel Cinematic Universe.
Ben Hosley's line quoted from a Reddit comment contrasts a one-person Michael Mann film with Marvel's committee films.
“when I watch a Michael Mann movie, I can tell this was made by one person, Marvel movies aren't made by one person”
programming (programming):
E/R → Miami Vice - Pilot (Brother's Keeper).
The E/R sitcom pilot aired the same night as Miami Vice with a rating of 23 versus 22.8.
“Airing the same night as Miami Vice, which is number two, with 22.8 million.”
career (career):
Edge of Tomorrow → Oblivion.
Oblivion is the other movie Cruise made in this stretch where he is messing with his persona: a man who looks and acts like Tom Cruise but does not know who he is.
“oblivion, the other movie he made in this time where he's trying shit”
programming (programming):
Edge of Tomorrow → RoboCop.
The hosts recorded a RoboCop commentary in the slot where Edge was originally scheduled, and the opening news montage reminds them of RoboCop's.
theme (shared theme):
Anthony Burgess → The Wanting Seed (novel).
Burgess's earlier novel is another dystopia, about overpopulation and food scarcity instead of violence.
“the Anthony Burgess novel before a Clockwork Orange is very similar in that it's a dystopian future”
industry (industry):
The Lego Batman Movie → Fifty Shades Darker.
Lego Batman opened to 53 and beat Fifty Shades Darker (46) and John Wick: Chapter 2 on opening weekend.
Blank Check — Patreon ·
Eclipse ·
0:12:41 ·
Ben Hosley
(0.60 sure it was them)
programming (programming):
The Twilight Saga: Eclipse → Toy Story 3.
Eclipse opened the same weekend as Toy Story 3, Last Airbender and Grown Ups (box office game).
“It's Toy Story 3, and it's the weekend.”
Blank Check — Patreon ·
Eclipse ·
2:10:08 ·
Ben Hosley
(0.50 sure it was them)
people (people):
Knight and Day → James Mangold.
The box-office game's last clue: a James Mangold action film with a huge actor; most forgotten entry in both filmographies.
“Which is one of those movies that I rewatch with being like, is this good, Mangold?”
Blank Check — Patreon ·
Eclipse ·
2:10:49 ·
Ben Hosley
(0.50 sure it was them)
programming (programming):
Wong Kar-wai → Steve McQueen.
Wong Kar-wai beat McQueen 55-45; voters worried McQueen's films are heavy for the podcast.
“I think a lot of people were hesitant to vote McQueen because the episodes on 12 years of slave and hunger.”
theme (theme):
The Lighthouse → Dark Waters.
Golden Mops (Ben's movies-that-made-him-cry/wet): traditional pick is The Lighthouse, 'drenched in farts'; Dark Waters a dark horse.
unmapped (dismissed):
Motherless Brooklyn → Motherless Brooklyn.
Ben's No Thank You for Motherless Brooklyn: a friend who is a stuttering advocate found it offensive.
“My good friend is a stuttering advocate and was very offended by the movie.”
industry (industry):
Uncut Gems → Climax.
Ben's honorable mentions: Safdies for Uncut Gems for scum-bummery; Climax for best voguing scene of all time.
contrast (contrast):
Thor → The Lion King (2019 trailer).
The argument over Thor's desaturated palette turns into an argument over how bad the Lion King trailer's color looks.
“The color is so bad in that trailer.”
Blank Check — Patreon ·
Thor ·
0:29:24 ·
Ben Hosley
(0.45 sure it was them)
Their fun items
Showing 1–27 of 27 fun items.
fun, about
Jan Hammer:
Ben says he went on a few dates with Jan Hammer's daughter, and the hosts propose a segment of David pumping arms to the theme.
“You know, I went on a few dates with Jan Hammer's daughter.”
fun, about
Volunteers:
Tom Hanks and John Candy Peace Corps comedy; Hanks met Rita Wilson.
“The movie's called Volunteers.”
Blank Check with Griffin & David ·
Flesh+Blood ·
1:32:52 ·
Ben Hosley
(0.50 sure it was them)
fun, about
Ben Hosley:
Running bit: the hosts try endless producer nicknames and pitch Benducer, Beniptanium and others, while Ben delivers a deadpan joke about being bald.
“I don't like to be referred to as a bald man, okay?”
fun, about
Doug Liman:
Liman's agent told him 'you don't always have to be the bad guy'; he has a bedside-manner reputation, tolerated while the movies hit.
fun, about
Ben Awards: remakes:
Films to remake with babies, animals, puppets, fruit, clowns (Ben's annual awards): baby Irishman, real-animal Lion King, puppet Souvenir.
“It's films that should be remade with either babies, animals, or puppets.”
fun, about
Iron Man 3 / Ben's pitch:
Pre-show bit: producer Ben pitches hacker witches as a million-dollar idea, then a Night Eggs villain idea (witches who hack by hand-waving).
“I just think that's a that's a $1000000 idea.”
Blank Check — Patreon ·
Iron Man 3 ·
0:05:13 ·
Ben Hosley
(0.50 sure it was them)
fun, about
Ben Hosley and the buried jeans:
Ben has buried three pairs of Levi's in his parents' backyard for 6, 9 and 12 months as a fashion line, and plans to put natural dyes and seeds in the pockets.
“I bought Levi's jeans, and I buried them in my parents' backyard.”
fun, about
Thor:
The hammer lab scene: SHIELD builds a lab around the unliftable Mjolnir and the hosts adore Jasper Sitwell showing up here five movies before his turn.
“Hammer lab.”
Blank Check — Patreon ·
Thor ·
0:56:02 ·
Ben Hosley
(0.40 sure it was them)
fun, about
Vanilla Sky:
Ben saw it at a drive-in in the back seat, making out, and absorbed very little.