Actor-host with a deep interest in how TV pilots evolve and how Michael Mann's style bleeds into everything. Loves Thief best of Mann's work. Jokes about being unhireable and the Netflix job that vanished.
Stances
Thief is his top Mann film
Pilots that feel like complete little movies are best
Defends the guest Dana Stevens against Twitter critics
Humor: Self-deprecating, long bits about his own failed career and his mother's British ancestry.
In their words
“I think you were going to think my rankings are crazy.” (1:07:55)
Loves the original Planet of the Apes franchise and Tim Burton, and was a fan of the 2001 hype as a kid. Can't stand empty studio filmmaking with no point of view. A sucker for childhood fandom and memorabilia (action figures, Lisa Marie).
Stances
Burton's Apes is the first time a beloved director failed him
The makeup is the only thing worth praising
The film does not have a point of view
Humor: Self-deprecating nerd-confessional anecdotes and riffs on childhood devotion.
In their words
“I was like, peak Griff moving nerd fanaticism.” (0:16:56)
“I had all the action figures before the movie came out.” (0:18:01)
Appears to love specific film trivia and the New York of the film; teases about being downtown. Lines identified with him are low-confidence because the transcript has no speaker labels.
Stances
Recalls opening-weekend box office from memory
Lives and grew up near the film's downtown locations (inferred)
Humor: Dry bits and running gags; becomes 'Downtown Griffey Nooms' under the guest's teasing.
In their words
“I have a TV pair of glasses now.” (0:31:40)
“This is the game where I try to recall from memory the box office the weekend the movie open.” (1:57:23)
Blank Check with Griffin & David: Flesh+Blood (host)
Loves Verhoeven and says RoboCop, Toy Story 2 and Rushmore rank among his favorites. Worries about the Weinstein-era toxicity in this film. Fascinated by effects-driven classicism and by the Hauer/Verhoeven split.
Stances
Flesh+Blood is anthropological and fascinating but joyless
Verhoeven is a technical classicist smuggling extreme content into Hollywood form
Rooted for RoboCop being a favorite
Humor: Rambling bits, tangents and character voices.
In their words
“I have never been more excited to talk about a film on this podcast.” (1:38:03)
Seems to love practical Spielberg staging and sound design, character actors with great faces, and nostalgic picks like Harriet the Spy. Cannot stand lazy sequels with no story, CGI overuse and nostalgia-canonized movies. Is a sucker for merchandise history and a good Austin Powers rewatch.
Stances
Lost World has a plot but no story and is bottom five Spielberg
Spielberg fails when he directs with one arm behind his back
Jurassic World is far worse
Humor: Escalating riffs and running bits, including bad impressions, nicknames for the producer and self-deprecating Goldblum failure.
In their words
“I've never been able to get there.” (0:00:55)
“Spielberg, I think, always fails when he tries to direct with one arm behind his back.” (0:32:33)
Loves ambitious, misguided, disastrous failures and admits a near sexual fetish for them; gravitates toward films that are naked and transparent about their director's ego. Cannot stand being unable to follow exposition but still wants to rewatch. A sucker for Shyamalan trivia, mythology worldbuilding critique, and the film-about-filmmaking read.
Stances
Lady in the Water is bad but fascinating and he likes it a lot
Watchability is not linked to quality
The film is Shyamalan's defensive reaction to critics after The Village
Shyamalan films are crisis-of-faith movies about family
Humor: Runs elaborate recurring bits and segments (Burger Report, IMDb trivia corner, rewrite station, comedy points) and self-deprecating panic-attack anecdotes.
In their words
“I admit that I have a near sexual fetish for super ambitious misguided failures.” (1:36:00)
“I like this movie a lot.” (1:35:51)
“And so watchability is a thing that I don't link to quality.” (1:49:31)
An actor and comedian who loves Robert Downey Jr. (Ally McBeal, Bowfinger) and loves cataloguing credits, billing, and who produced what. Can't stand hacky, symbolic drama like The Judge or misjudged comedies like Wedding Crashers and Fred Claus. A sucker for Shanghai Noon, Due Date, and Dax Shepard's character.
Stances
The Judge is treacle with a Dobkin comedy brain stuck in a prestige drama
Downey needs a real director like PTA or Raimi to surprise audiences
Duvall phoning it in beats De Niro or Pacino phoning it in
Humor: Long riffing metaphors (the bar mitzvah, the bagel), bodily-fluid gags, and self-deprecating asides about the show's tiny audience.
In their words
“It feels like the way that 13 year old boys have to act during their bar mitzvah” (0:56:38)
“Overbagled.” (0:28:55)
“Now you're stuck with us talking about the judge.” (0:03:31)
A deep pop-culture archaeologist who loves He-Man (especially Orko), Henson fantasy, Toy Story, Barbie, and the Lego movies, and who voiced Orko himself. He is skeptical of masculine man-defends-his-castle fantasy and of defensive, self-embarrassed jokes. He is a sucker for the Hudsucker Proxy, odd animation like Raggedy Ann & Andy, and word-of-mouth box office oddities.
Stances
The film gets the metatextual framework right but only gets 60% there
Toy movies are mostly bad except those not driven by a product
He-Man himself is his least favorite part of He-Man
Orko was unforgivably withheld
Humor: Nerdy, rapid-fire trivia and self-aware jokes about his own obsessions and merchandise hoarding.
In their words
“I have way too much He-Man merchandise.” (0:37:20)
“He's what a child thinks they would be as a grown up if they got really buff and strong.” (0:31:53)
“It is a movie entirely about the hula hoop.” (1:34:41)
Griffin is a long-time Cameron enthusiast and sincere blockbuster fan, someone who watches trailers on loop and gets choked up by them. He loves a clean engineered story and defends Avatar's sincerity. He dislikes meta, smirky franchise filmmaking.
Stances
Avatar's clunky human dialogue is deliberate
Franchise filmmaking is in a crisis point
Cameron has earned the benefit of the doubt
Humor: Affable and self-deprecating, with long enthusiastic riffs.
In their words
“I'm beyond excited.” (1:41:16)
“I truly get like emotionally choked up watching these trailers” (1:41:52)
A RoboCop devotee with posters, a bust and a bootleg toy in the office, who loves the Verhoeven original and its satire. He can't stand humorless grounded remakes that cut the jokes and the visor. A sucker for baseball giveaways at Mets games and Easter eggs done right.
Stances
The remake is an F and worse than Ouija
Satire and humor are what make the original
A black suit with no detail is a failure
Robocop should be dumb and funny, not cool
Humor: Rants and elaborate analogies, like the pizza series, delivered with escalating mock fury.
In their words
“I'm just gonna come out and say this is an F.” (0:55:03)
“Robocop one is like the best pizza you've ever had.” (1:29:28)
Loves Edge of Tomorrow as a masterpiece and Cruise's turn toward weird, low-status roles; likes Oblivion and Looper-era Blunt; likes Liman's chaos when it works. Can't stand Liman's later films like Road House.
Stances
Edge is a five-star film that improves on repeat
This is Cruise's pivot to the McQuarrie era
Alien design here and in Arrival is rare in the 2010s
Humor: Rapid riffs and movie-industry gossip, often wrapping a joke around a bit of trivia.
In their words
“Edge of tomorrow is 5 stars.” (0:07:20)
“It is truly a movie that gets better every time you watch it.” (0:07:25)
Loves cult comedy and genre curiosities such as Perfect Dark, Nirvana the Band, and weird bracket ideas like Psycho with Bates Motel. Enthusiastic about Peter Weir, Welles, and Del Toro. Dislikes long filmographies as a rule and bad Robocop sequels.
Stances
Wants more Peter Weir and Orson Welles
Votes against the long boy in every matchup
Grudge: RoboCop 2 should never put the mask back on
Humor: Builds committed running bits (pitmaster, Chip Smith) and doubles down until the room breaks.
A Lynch fan who loves Eraserhead as a pure raw expression of an outsider and calls it a fully arrived masterpiece. Loves the bit-work of generating nicknames and sorting debut films into buckets. Can't stand eggs and gets queasy at the chicken-carving idea.
Stances
Eraserhead is a masterpiece debut
It is coherent and autobiographical, not impenetrable
Debut films fall into rough draft, masterpiece and a third bucket
Humor: Escalating riffs and mock-pompous bits about nicknames, with self-aware jabs at the show.
In their words
“And this is him just doing the pure raw expression version of basically the same idea.” (0:26:19)
“Holy shit, who the fuck is this guy fully arrived masterpiece.” (0:16:34)
Runs the show and the episode dossier, and loves production-disaster minutiae, alternate titles and what-if histories. A sucker for 90s studio chaos and podcast in-jokes (jelly trilogy, Forky). Frustrated by a movie that is dark and muddy and has no scary monsters.
Stances
Eaters of the Dead was the better title
The version worth making is a smaller, pulpier one
Defends Mank and is a Fincher-series completist who ranks Zodiac first; loves the autobiographical reading of The Killer (Fincher mocking his own control). A sucker for Tilda Swinton performances and for details like the Smiths playlist. Uncertain about the Soderbergh-style streaming deal.
Stances
The Killer is about filmmaking and Fincher's own process
Fincher's Netflix deal is a bad fit for streaming
Mank is a celebration of a cantankerous artist and a self-portrait
Humor: Absurdist riffs, Letterboxd one-liners, and long tangents about fast food.
In their words
“My letterbox type clip on the movie is a psychological horror film about David Fincher imagining a reality where he's only allowed one take.” (0:22:44)
“It's fucking Sidney Lumette's making movies.” (1:24:53)
Likes the Hearst scenes and the performances, but is less sold on the movie than David and Sean. Comes at it as a wounded theatrical-experience loser, upset he never saw it in a theater.
Stances
Wishes he'd seen it in a theater
Likes the movie less than David
Wants more Fincher Tuppence Middleton
Humor: Self-deprecating, tangent-prone, and loves puns like 'Mancrodosing'.
In their words
“I cannot stop thinking about how angry I am that I never got to see this in a theater.” (0:20:21)
“I'm circling the island.” (2:27:36)
“Mancrodosing. Five minutes of manca day.” (0:22:58)
Carries the Fincher-completist trivia (the unmade projects, the casting what-ifs) and is deep in the Affleck and Reese Witherspoon career talk. Likes a franchise that earns its box office, and says he is all in on the Equalizer films. Can't stand a lazy cable-movie career move, and has lost patience with TV coverage on the show.
Stances
Fincher's unmade projects (Star Wars, 20,000 Leagues) are as interesting as the films
Wants Equalizer 3 to reach $103 million
Mindhunter was an episode he and David did not want to cover, because TV multiplies the work
Humor: Runs dead-pan bits at length (the Quibby and Reese 'Fierce Queens' routine) and keeps count of the numbers.
In their words
“Star Wars, episode seven.” (0:25:36)
“The Equalizer one made $101 million domestically.” (2:53:28)
“Dave and I really didn't want to do this episode.” (3:03:23)
Loves Fincher, comfort rewatches, commentary tracks and the research dossier; admires Rooney Mara and the film's gentleness at the margins. Can't stand the Swedish films' flatness or the Spider's Web reboot. A sucker for a good casting story and a recurring bit.
Stances
Dismisses the Swedish films as mid
calls this a movie that improves on rewatch
defends Fincher's reshoots as worth it.
Humor: Runs bits to exhaustion (string cheese, Clint Eastwood railroading, strangling-each-other energy) and teases Ben.
In their words
“I saw it Christmas time, 2011.” (0:25:28)
“I've been trying to watch most of these movies with commentaries.” (1:10:15)
“I just remember when the trailer for this came out” (0:34:01)
Loves Sorkin's dialogue and Fincher's rigor, and is the host with an actor's view of auditions and sets. Dismissive of Facebook as an experience now. A sucker for behind-the-scenes lore and the Blu-ray extras.
Stances
The script's pace is the movie
Fincher's many takes freed the actors
Humor: Rambling, self-aware riffs and character-voice bits.
In their words
“I pointedly remember that the they sent the script out, but for the auditions, it was just other Sorkin scenes.” (0:52:46)
“So this script hits and like every single person on set is like, I'm just trying to get any fucking part in the sofa work.” (0:51:41)
Became a Fincher believer at Zodiac and was all in for Button on the strength of that and the teaser. Reads Button as a deliberate anti-Gump about death rather than a failed weepy. Likes the film's passivity and its refusal to give catharsis.
Stances
Button is pointedly an anti-Gump
the film is more Fincher than its reputation allows
the hospital framing is the real film
Humor: Rapid-fire impressions and callback bits, including the running seven-but-looks-older line.
In their words
“But I think it's almost like pointedly an anti-gump.” (0:22:50)
“Whatever this guy's next movie is, this is now I'm most anticipated movie.” (0:17:37)
Their shows' recurring bits
Running bits, not opinions; a critic read aloud is cited, not present.
The Big Picture
Drafts: Hosts and guests draft films in rounds; every pick is a recommendation with an argument.
Hall of Fame: A star's or director's best, ranked and argued.
Countdowns: Ranked lists, top five or top ten.
Blank Check with Griffin & David
The box office game: Guessing the film's opening weekend and what it was up against.
The sung theme: "Blank Check with Griffin and David", sung; the transcriber garbles it.
Their claims
Showing 901–1,000 of 1,162 claims.
career (career):
Brad Dourif → Deadwood (TV).
Dourif was Emmy-nominated on Deadwood and had a recurring Star Trek Voyager part.
career (career):
Ron Perlman → Guillermo del Toro.
Perlman says his American career was saved by Jeunet and Del Toro, who cast him in Cronos and City of Lost Children.
“my American career was entirely saved by Gene and Del Toro.”
contrast (contrast):
Alien Resurrection → Terminator: Dark Fate.
Studios kept trying to make Terminator something different, unlike Alien's willingness to hire dark people.
“Versus, I feel like 3 Terminator movies in a row where they were like, I don't know, can we make it into something different?”
career (career):
Sigourney Weaver → Political Animals (TV).
Weaver played a Hillary Clinton-like figure on the miniseries Political Animals, which Griffin was on.
what-if (what-if):
Alien → Neill Blomkamp.
A Neill Blomkamp-type director might some day talk the studio into an Earth-set Alien sequel; Disney will do something.
“I live in fear of the sort of Neil Blonde camp-esque director”
industry (industry):
Alien Resurrection → The Jackal.
Number five was The Jackal, a remake of The Day of the Jackal with Bruce Willis and Richard Gere.
unmapped (merchandise):
Aliens (toy line) → Alien 3.
The animal-aliens toy line sold under the Aliens brand around Alien 3, and the idea of multiple infected animals was once a story premise.
“But there was a point where the premise was that you were going to have multiple face huggers infecting different animals”
career (career):
Greg Kinnear → As Good as It Gets.
Ephron and Delia wanted the actor after his As Good as It Gets notices and he was about to blow up.
“Uh, it's Delia Nora Efron, go see as good as it gets.”
industry (industry):
Greg Kinnear → You've Got Mail.
Kinnear agreed to take the part on condition that his character's exit be the softer restaurant scene.
“Kinnear said, I'll do the movie if this is how my character line ends.”
industry (industry):
Nora Ephron → Amy Pascal.
Ephron's films usually began with a powerful woman producer or executive: Pascal, Obst, here Schuler Donner.
“So like so much of her career is like Amy Pascal and Linda Opst, and this one is Lauren Schuler Donner.”
lineage (lineage):
You've Got Mail → The Shop Around the Corner.
Warner Brothers inherited the Turner library and the producer picked The Shop Around the Corner to remake.
“Lauren Schuler Donner looks at the library and goes, huh, shop around the corner.”
contrast (contrast):
You've Got Mail → The Shop Around the Corner.
In every earlier version the rivals are coworkers whose jobs are at stake; here they run rival businesses and she is not poor.
“So so much of the rivalry between the 2 characters is they're fighting for who becomes the most valuable employee of this store because if one of them nudges out the other, their entire life might be ruined.”
lineage (lineage):
You've Got Mail → Ninotchka.
Ephron borrowed the idea of rivals who are two sides of one coin from a Lubitsch picture.
“I mean she's pulling from like a different Lubich movie, which is here are 2 people who are opposite sides of the coin, don't realize they get along that way.”
craft (craft):
You've Got Mail → The Shop Around the Corner.
Three scenes appear almost verbatim in all three screen versions, including the friend's line about her coloring.
“3 scenes that exist almost verbatim in all 3 movie versions, which are the scene with the friend, the Dave Chappelle scene where he takes a look at her.”
what-if (what-if):
Nicolas Cage → Michael.
Swap Cage and Travolta: Cage in Michael, Travolta in City of Angels, since Cage is weirder and Travolta the better romantic lead.
“I think Nicholas Cage should have played Michael and John Travolta should have been in City of Angels with Meg Ryan.”
theme (theme):
Hanging Up → Mixed Nuts.
Like a movie a guest watched alone as a child, Hanging Up is a household movie in the speaker's sibling relationship.
“movies that are like, this is a household movie.”
craft (craft):
Diane Keaton → Hanging Up.
Keaton says she leaves actors alone, yet the film's big choices came in the editing room with gauzy crossfades.
“her biggest decisions are being made in the editing room at this movie.”
craft (craft):
Hanging Up → Elizabeth.
The score comes from the composer of Elizabeth and Shine and is more conventional or weighty than expected.
“the score from this movie is done by the man who did the score, his 2 previous, like, big scores before this, his 2 Oscar nominations were Elizabeth, and Shine.”
industry (industry):
Tracee Ellis Ross → Hanging Up.
Tracee Ellis Ross in a thankless assistant role is offered as an example of women of color in service roles in 90s rom-coms.
“you see a lot of like women of color showing up in thankless roles either as like service workers or personal assistants”
contrast (contrast):
Hanging Up → Sleepless in Seattle.
Ephron made chemistry between leads who never share a room in Sleepless; Hanging Up's phone-separated sisters lack it.
“Nora Efron made a fucking movie, Sleepless in Seattle, where your 2 leads have chemistry together, despite not actually speaking until the last 10 minutes of the movie.”
industry (industry):
Hanging Up → Funny People.
Rich-person movies cost more because the locations must be rented and filled, as Apatow said of Funny People.
“it costs a lot of money to make a movie about a rich person.”
contrast (contrast):
Hanging Up → You've Got Mail.
You've Got Mail still holds up because it understood email's psychology; Hanging Up's phone premise has aged out.
“you've got mail and you're like, they understood the psychological and sociological impact of email, even if the technology changed.”
programming (programming):
The Tigger Movie → Walt Disney Company.
Disney was releasing Pooh movies meant for direct-to-video in theaters outside its summer and holiday windows.
“the only movies they weren't dropping in summer or holiday season were those poo movies”
people (people):
Terry Windell → The Tick.
Griffin says Windell was special effects supervisor on every episode of The Tick and mourns his sudden death after wrapping.
“he was the special effects supervisor on every episode of the tech.”
contrast (contrast):
Chris Gethard → Shane Gillis.
Recurring joke: Gethard doesn't like Shane Gillis; the original Blankies host plan fell through when Gillis got in trouble.
contrast (contrast):
Florence Pugh → Candice Bergen.
Griffin dubs Pugh the new Candice Bergen, who is the new LeBron James, because all three 'get buckets' and are great on Instagram.
“Because Florence Pugh is the new Candace Bergen, who is the new LeBron James because she gets fucking buckets.”
contrast (contrast):
Doctor Sleep → Roman J. Israel, Esq..
A film Griffin half-liked whose director's cut may turn out to be amazing, like Roman J. Israel (named as a past analog).
“That's the Roman J Israel this year where I'm like, that movie that I kind of liked but had problems with might be amazing.”
verdict (verdict):
Judi Dench → Cats.
Fifth supporting-actress nominee: Dench's pure presence and commitment to something ridiculous is the hardest, most impressive performance of the year.
“that is the hardest and most impressive performance of the year.”
contrast (contrast):
Judi Dench → Ian McKellen.
Everyone praises McKellen in Cats, but Dench's performance is mostly others talking about how important she is while it cuts back to her.
“And so much of Judy's performance is literally just other people talking about how she's the most important creature in the world and them cutting back to her.”
career (career):
Annette Bening → 20th Century Women.
The 20th Century Women snub was 'about as bad as the election of Donald Trump'; Bening snubbed twice running.
“Well, the 20th century woman snub is about as bad as like the election of Donald Trump.”
verdict (verdict):
Jamie Bell → Rocketman.
Bell is the heart of Rocketman; his David Oyelowo award for the hardest job, playing a decent, uncomplicated person.
“It is my David Oyello award for the thing that's toughest to do, which is just to play a decent on complicated person.”
contrast (contrast):
Sophie Okonedo → Ricky and the Flash.
Like the Audra McDonald scene in Ricky and the Flash, Okonedo's role has layers from racial dynamics that make it unclear whether script or casting supplied them.
“That the Audra McDonald scene, where there are all these interesting layers added because of the racial dynamics of it”
verdict (verdict):
Sophie Okonedo → Wild Rose.
Late shout-out: Okonedo plays the nuance of a 'white savior'-sounding story with flipped dynamics in every moment.
“Sophie Akinado plays the sort of nuance of that in every moment, is incredibly compelling and impressive to me.”
contrast (contrast):
Toy Story 4 → Frozen 2.
Toy Story 4 is lumped with Frozen 2 and Rise of Skywalker as films that threw out the entire screenplay and started over.
“Toy Story 4 falls into this weird thing of like Frozen 2 and Rise of Skywalker”
industry (industry):
Stephanie Folsom → Toy Story 4.
Final credit is Folsom and Stanton; earlier drafts from other writers over many failed attempts were 'insulting and disastrous'.
“The final credit is Stephanie Folsom and Andrew Stanton.”
verdict (verdict):
Antonio Banderas → Pain and Glory.
Banderas is Griffin's best actor winner; he saw an early screening and cats trailer dropped the same day.
“Banderas, I will always have close to my heart because I saw pain and glory.”
unmapped (anecdote):
Pain and Glory → Cats.
Griffin first saw the Cats trailer on his phone in the hallway outside the Pain and Glory screening, so the two are wrapped together in his head.
“And so like that and pain and glory have been like wrapped up in my head.”
verdict (verdict):
K Callan → Knives Out.
Putters and Murmurs shout-out; who played 'Mock Kent' on Lewis and Clark: the Adventures of Superman (as transcribed).
“But K. Callan, who played Mock Kent on Lewis and Clark the Adventures of Superman.”
verdict (verdict):
Robert De Niro → The Irishman.
De Niro wins the 'Mark Wahlberg Award': will a movie into existence, produce it, play the lead well, and let everyone else get nominated.
“De Niro wins the Mark Wahlberg Award for the year”
contrast (contrast):
Robert De Niro → Mark Wahlberg.
De Niro wins the 'Mark Wahlberg Award' of the year, like Wahlberg's The Fighter: a quiet-hero producer-star who gets only a picture nomination.
fun, about
Hanging Up:
Delia Ephron, overheard in a theater, said Keaton ruined the best thing she would write (told by Bobby on the You've Got Mail episode).
fun, about
Diane Keaton:
Keaton's directing career before Hanging Up: Belinda Carlisle videos, a documentary, and a CBS special with a very sensitive title.
“it has the very, very sensitive title of the girl with the crazy brother.”
fun, about
Terry Windell:
Terry Wendell (Windell) made Palpatine's lightning and the next year Ghostbusters' proton streams; the speaker's colleague on a show, who died days after wrapping.
“Terry Wendell is the visual effects artist who did Palpatine's lighting.”
fun, about
Star Wars: Episode VI – Return of the Jedi:
May 1983 box office: Jedi opened number one, ahead of Blue Thunder, Flashdance, Breathless, Tootsie, in a quiz format.
fun, about
Blankies host:
No one wants to host the Blankies; the planned host was Shane Gillis until he 'pushed too many boundaries'; the 'metaphor doesn't track' because you don't miss a boundary when pushing.
fun, about
Judi Dench in Cats:
Judi Dench's Cats performance: pure presence and commitment to something ridiculous; looks the most ridiculous of anyone.
“It is pure presence and pure commitment to something that is ridiculous.”
fun, about
Pain and Glory and the Cats trailer:
Griffin walked out of Pain and Glory and watched the Cats trailer on his phone in the hallway, then found a sandwich.
“walked out of that screaming and the cats trailer had dropped.”
fun, about
Ludacris at the F9 livestream:
While recording, the hosts watch the F9 trailer livestream concert; Ludacris performs, wearing a 'fake moon landing' shirt.
“Ludacris is wearing a shirt that says fake moon landing, no stars in the sky.”
fun, about
Fast & Furious 9 livestream:
While recording, Griffin keeps checking the F9 trailer livestream; he is 'genuinely having a panic attack waiting for this trailer'.
“I'm genuinely having a panic attack waiting for this trailer, so I'm ending this episode right now.”
fun, about
Avengers: Infinity War:
Opening ritual: the hosts try to start the film in sync with a Thanos snap, botching the remote and resetting twice.
“David, I'm going to go three, two, one, and then I want you to do a Thanos snap.”
fun, about
Benedict Wong:
Wong once attended a Blank Check taping, then flew to New York on Robert Downey Jr.'s private jet while Downey went to see the Grateful Dead; he and Peter Serafinowitz met in West End Star Trek Live.
“They appeared in a West End production of Star Trek Live”
fun, about
Robert Downey Jr.:
Griffin recalls Downey's baffling Instagram video announcing a Rolling Stones and NASA collaboration, in front of a 1997 screensaver.
“Have you guys seen the video of Robert Downey Jr. announcing the collaboration between The Rolling Stones and NASA?”
fun, about
Avengers theme:
Griffin plays the Avengers theme to feel confident before shows and auditions and imagines himself part of an end-credit scene.
“I listen to the Avengers theme and I walk down the streets of New York City and I think that like I'm part of an end credit scene.”
fun, about
Stellan Skarsgard:
In the Greenwich scene, Selvig is naked again in the no-pants zone; the speakers joke he must have written a nude clause into his Marvel deal.
fun, about
Frigga:
Frigga's Viking funeral, defended as the movie taking itself seriously; Portman later wears Frigga's dress, which the speaker says makes zero size sense.
fun, about
Heimdall:
Heimdall guards the rainbow bridge alone; the speakers debate what podcasts he'd listen to: not Comedy Bang, more S-Town or documentary.
fun, about
Benicio del Toro:
The Collector mid-credits scene: Benicio del Toro as Space Nesia whispers 'don't tell anybody'; the speakers imagine his demands on the Guardians ride.
“It's weird also that in this scene he leans in and goes, don't tell anybody.”
fun, about
Joss Whedon:
Whedon's pitch meeting: said the Zak Penn script was garbage; also told Downey it's a team movie with Cap leading, no Iron Man movie.
fun, about
Mark Ruffalo:
Ruffalo's career: Lonergan breakout, dropped out of Signs with an ear tumor, rom-com rut ('the mailman'), then Zodiac, Oscar nomination, and the Avengers call.
fun, about
Mark Ruffalo:
His agent told him to look out the window at 5:30 AM; a black car meant Comic-Con and the announcement as the Hulk, hours later.
“if there's a black car parked outside, it's to take you to the airport to go to Comic-Con.”
fun, about
Hulk:
See the scene where Banner reveals he shot himself and the Hulk spat the bullet out; he stays calm by always being angry (1:12:30, then 1:54:08 payoff).
“He shot himself in the head and he turned into the Hulk and the Hulk spit the bullet out.”
fun, about
Phil Coulson:
Coulson dies at about 1:25 with his Captain America cards bloodied; Griffin notes Clark Gregg returns for Captain Marvel's 1990s setting.
“Phil Colson worshiped him so much with the blood on them.”
fun, about
Hawkeye:
Hawkeye can run out of arrows (2:00-2:03) and Griffin hates knowing it; see the 'Vulture' stopwatch article claiming only six minutes of Hawkeye screen time.
“poor Hawkeye only has like 6 minutes of screen time.”
fun, about
Griffin Newman:
Griffin was a 90-pound mono-recovering actor who ate four cheeseburgers and a milkshake at the Disney store lunch break to gain mass and wondered why he didn't get the part.
“I would buy 4 cheeseburgers in a milkshake, and I would down it in 20 minutes”
fun, about
Zola (the reasonable Nazi):
Griffin's complaint: Zola is the voice of reason while Red Skull is cartoonish; he wants the evil doctor to cackle, not question atomizers as inhumane.
fun, about
Merchandise:
Production started so late that toys and binders were made from concept art, so Cap merchandise shows the wrong costume with the helmet still on, and Red Skull has a black nose.
“A, all of the Captain American merchandise for this movie has the wrong costume.”
fun, about
Thor:
See the opening Thor-throws-his-coffee-mug-on-the-ground scene; Ben calls it the best part of the movie.
“He throws his coffee on the ground.”
Blank Check — Patreon ·
Thor ·
0:01:51 ·
Griffin Newman
(0.40 sure it was them)
fun, about
Anthony Hopkins:
Hopkins reportedly took Odin because he circled every scene with NAR, no acting required; the bit gets tied to Blank Check's lexicon of River of Ham.
“I read the script, and every scene, I just circled it and wrote NAR, and I went, I'm on board”
Blank Check — Patreon ·
Thor ·
0:09:03 ·
Griffin Newman
(0.45 sure it was them)
fun, about
Kenneth Branagh:
River of Ham: Ray Stevenson fears dipping his toe in the river of ham and Branagh tells him to take a swim; the hosts include it in the Blank Check lexicon.
“I bathed in that river many times.”
Blank Check — Patreon ·
Thor ·
0:15:16 ·
Griffin Newman
(0.40 sure it was them)
fun, about
Thor:
See the Hawkeye cameo: Jeremy Renner perched in a crow's nest deliberating whether to shoot Thor, never speaking to him, clearly shot on a day no one else worked.
“Isn't it just clear that Renner came in on a day when no one else was working?”
Blank Check — Patreon ·
Thor ·
1:00:04 ·
Griffin Newman
(0.40 sure it was them)
fun, about
Stellan Skarsgard:
A long running bit: the hosts hunt the internet for Skarsgard nudity, ending on a site they say tells you which minute to watch of each movie, and an unused plan to have listeners tweet at Ben.
“Hey, if you can find the pean, hashtag, uh, find the pean for Ben.”
Blank Check — Patreon ·
Thor ·
1:17:40 ·
Griffin Newman
(0.50 sure it was them)
fun, about
Thor:
Natalie Portman and Hemsworth kiss at an impossible height, with her seeming to stand on 17 ladders; the hosts wish for the wide shot or a canted angle with Hemsworth bending 90 degrees.
“Allie Portman is standing on 17 ladders.”
Blank Check — Patreon ·
Thor ·
1:33:51 ·
Griffin Newman
(0.40 sure it was them)
fun, about
Thor:
Rene Russo gets one moment with a big sword and almost no lines as Frigga; Dark World gives her more.
“She doesn't have much to do in this.”
Blank Check — Patreon ·
Thor ·
1:34:35 ·
Griffin Newman
(0.35 sure it was them)
fun, about
A.O. Scott:
The hosts read A.O. Scott's Thor review opening about fleeing the IMAX into the velvet shadows of an art house, then Samuel L. Jackson's tweet telling fans he needs a new job.
“Avengers fans, New York Times critic AO Scott needs a new job.”
Blank Check — Patreon ·
Thor ·
1:36:38 ·
Griffin Newman
(0.50 sure it was them)
fun, about
Rio:
Rio killed Pixar's Newt: the trailer showed the same last-of-the-species-must-mate premise, so Pixar cancelled the film it announced.
“the Rio trailer came out and they were like, fuck, that's the same premise and they're going to beat us by 3 years.”
Blank Check — Patreon ·
Thor ·
1:53:22 ·
Griffin Newman
(0.40 sure it was them)
fun, about
Mickey Rourke:
Rourke's Chihuahua died right before filming; he allegedly made PAs hold up pictures of the dog and its belongings for the crying and screaming scenes.
“And he apparently would make PAs hold up pictures of his dog and like his dog's belongings for all these scenes where he's like crying and screaming.”
fun, about
Mickey Rourke:
Rumor of Rourke and Rockwell as the two villains played well, then Rourke trashed Marvel on the red carpet; the trailer was built around the Monte Carlo reveal of him.
“Maybe if those skinflints at Marvel open up their wallets a little bit.”
fun, about
The Tick:
Griffin's background-actor tale from The Tick: an extra twirling like Sound of Music in a happy crowd scene, and a recurring extra he called extra extra.
“And we called her extra extra because she did so much.”
fun, about
Ben Hosley:
Griffin posted a photo of Ben vaping; the replies ran from Colin Gossel to a good lounge-singer jazz album cover; it became a running gag.
fun, about
National Treasure:
Someone at Bruckheimer's office dropped pages of the unmade third film and a friend photographed the first three in a closet.
“a couple of the pages fell off and this friend like ran into like a closet and took photos of the 1st 3 pages”
fun, about
Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon:
Griffin and his dad disliked it at 11, but his memory of it kept improving: perfect recall played better and better.
“Sure. And my dad and I were both like, what's the fucking deal with that thing?”
fun, about
Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon:
The first fight: the whole first 35 minutes are people talking about how good Li Mu Bai is, then he shows up and it takes three moves.
“The entire 1st 35 minutes of the movie are people talking about how good he is at fighting.”