Reads the dossier and loves Kubrick's behind-the-scenes fights and the Harris partnership. Loves noir, character actors like Timothy Carey and Elisha Cook, and a good gimmick structure. Can't stand puns on a movie's title and is hard on bloated studio epics.
Stances
The Killing is Kubrick's first film he respects
Kubrick's control hardens after the Harris years
Bed of Fear is a worse title than The Killing
Humor: Deadpan riffs and bits about invented writers' rooms and Fox execs, plus affection for the bit that goes one step too far.
In their words
“I love how much this movie comes out of Kubrick's chess life in multiple ways.” (0:09:39)
“Because people hate puns.” (1:06:50)
“I just like imagining whoever the Fox exec was who was like, hey, Frank” (0:15:04)
Admires Kubrick more than he loves the films, though he loves The Shining and counts Eyes Wide Shut as a favorite; has never seen Barry Lyndon or Spartacus. Loves rough, process-visible first films and tactile photography. Skeptical of war films and of overlong thin plots.
Stances
Fear and Desire is not a good movie and should be shorter
The Killing and Killer's Kiss show Kubrick's rapid growth
Mythology around Kubrick is inflated by his silence
Humor: Rapid, profane riffs and movie-trivia bits that spiral into digressions.
In their words
“I've always admired him a lot more than I love his movies.” (0:11:35)
“This movie is interesting because he doesn't, really.” (0:36:52)
Griffin loves Lego Batman as the definitive Batman movie, Lego bricks, and animation limits that are exploited rather than hidden. He admires clever craft decisions (the shoulder-dislocation trick, the flame pieces) and sincere sentiment. He is a sucker for toy lore and trivia. He thinks the IP-cameo mashup is the film's one valid flaw.
Stances
Lego Batman is the best Batman movie, with the most complete understanding of the character
Robin works best as a contrast point, not a dark mirror of Batman
Limits (Lego rules, stop-motion look) produce better art
The Lego Movie is still the pinnacle
Humor: Rapid, pop-literate riffing and trivia dumps, plus running jokes about David's daughter and his Lego desires.
In their words
“I think this is the best Batman movie period.” (0:01:10)
“Lego movie is still the pinnacle for me, though.” (1:38:30)
Griffin runs the screening and knows the film cold, down to Becker's DVD commentary. He loves a film of stunning chaos and star-driven studio excess, and gets a kick out of continuity breakdowns and impossible geography. He pauses constantly to underline plot logic.
Stances
Old Dogs is demented but made by experienced professionals
Becker is a studio-comedy auteur of illogic
Pauses the film to explain what just happened
Humor: Deadpan lawyerly narration of absurd plot points, with the audience reacting.
In their words
“This is the most demented movie ever made.” (0:09:39)
“Now, as I press play again, I want you to take note of, there being zero puppets on stage.” (1:18:04)
Loves the self-aware comedy of the Adam West show and the density of its gags, and recounts comics lore (Robin lineage, Damian Wayne) with relish. Can't stand lazy branding on villains like the Riddler's single question mark. A sucker for gadgets, vehicles and Conan-style shorthand humor.
Stances
The 1966 movie is better written comedy than its camp reputation
Robins and rogues galleries are the weak spots of the film franchise
Humor: Rapid bit-building on villain puns and impressions.
In their words
“By the way, this is a blank check special features. I'm Griffin.” (0:13:50)
“For 5 seconds, I think people thought Crisis on Infinite Earth was gonna tie in the tick universe.” (0:05:04)
Likes Roger Moore Bond and the Apes films as franchise building blocks, and enjoys the structure of the bracket. Not stated much beyond this in the audio. Enthusiastic about doing Psycho.
Stances
Defends Apes as the root of franchise storytelling
Humor: Plays straight man to the Chip Smith bit and riffs on Oscars production.
Newly converted to In the Cut from a 'morbid curiosity' first viewing with David; deeply knows New York geography and nightlife, since he lived on the Lower East Side. Likes Practical Magic and Mark Ruffalo's balanced career, and is skeptical of Unfaithful. (Speaker labels are inferred; the transcript has none.)
Stances
The film is uncomfortable even if most criticisms at the time were stupid
Humor: Riffs on the podcast's own name and contractual obligation, and chases movie-trivia tangents.
In their words
“with morbid curiosity more than anything else, you know?” (0:10:45)
“I lived on 2nd Avenue and 6th Street” (0:44:56)
“I don't understand why people were going David loves it.” (0:13:01)
Went in ready to reappreciate the franchise and loved the first two films (came out of midnight screenings thinking of them as giddy, teenage and emotionally charged). Hates movies where characters refuse to make decisions and the plot stalls for time, and dislikes the permanence/teen-marriage logic of the books. Suckers for a bold swing, such as the last film's big deviation, and for Slade's horror-genre scenes. Attribution is partly inferred from context (baby, steel book, signing off at 2:12) so confidence is moderate.
Stances
Eclipse is lifeless and rudderless after the first two
Slade only seems to like the bad-vampire scenes
Twilight fandom deserves respect against gatekeeping
Humor: Dry riffs and long shaggy-dog trivia, escalating bits like Burger King toys and hand stuff.
In their words
“Here's my take on this movie.” (1:57:03)
“I'm so pro-kissing.” (0:43:06)
“Target canceled my steel book order for the 5th time.” (0:10:57)
Loves Jane Campion, Martin Brest underdog crusades, and franchise chaos like Twilight. Mixed on Terrence Malick relative to peers. Wary of revisiting Her.
Stances
Brest is his favorite uphill cause
Wants to treat bracket decisions fairly
Revisiting Her feels risky
Humor: Self-aware grandstanding bits and absurd matchup-logic riffs.
In their words
“I think it has like an incel quality to it.” (0:29:36)
“I'm half kidding, but actually, I'm not kidding.” (0:25:50)
Loves the franchise's iconography and design and tracks toy merchandise; sucker for actors who commit to weirdness and for Alien-series trivia. Admires Ridley Scott's business sense and finds the CGI creature the least interesting stretch. Cannot stand being distracted by texters in a theater.
Stances
Covenant should have kept the Franco prologue
Scott is a company man who slips interesting things into blockbusters
Actor-swap effects are only impressive when objects pass between the doubles
Loved the first three Alien movies in 7th grade and felt a massive drop-off with Resurrection, but is won over by the practical effects, the wet sets and Sigourney Weaver. A collector who owns every Ripley action figure but one. Cannot stand the generic villain casting and is sentimental about French cinema through his mother.
Stances
Resurrection is fun for the first hour and bogs down when characters stop to talk
Sigourney Weaver rules; Winona Ryder is a bore here
The ending should have stayed with the alien nest instead of heading to Earth
Glad an Earth-set Alien never happened
Humor: Self-deprecating storyteller who spins long tangents and doubles down on bits.
In their words
“It was the thing I looked forward to in 7th grade that I got to watch another alien movie at the end of the week.” (0:04:54)
“I'm now feeling like I might have to go back on.” (0:30:27)
Loves the Alien series enough to have made a weeks-long VHS triple feature of it as a kid, and defends Alien 3. Hates it when studios replace classic logos. A sucker for toy lines, chains, and bits that run on wordplay.
Stances
Alien 3 earns its place in the franchise and is better than its reputation
Bringing Ripley back as a clone is worse than killing Hicks and Newt
Studios should not swap old logos for new ones
Humor: Escalating riffs and puns, with a big appetite for tangents about menu-board details like toys and trivia.
In their words
“I think it totally earns its place within the franchise.” (1:26:00)
“I think the tuba is the funniest of all instruments.” (0:08:31)
Loves Rogue Nation and McQuarrie's practical, analog Cruise films, and takes film history personally. Can't stand Pixels-type junk but is a sucker for odd actors, villain tracksuits and wardrobe jokes.
Stances
Rogue Nation is the best M:I film
Practical stunts and clarity of stakes make the best action
Humor: Stacks absurd bits and running gags such as Luther's hat and the thigh move.
In their words
“I auditioned like 5 times for screen four, including 4 Wes Craven” (2:22:37)
Loves digging through the Blu-ray extras and commentaries for a movie and reporting back. Fond of rom-com construction and the industry backstory of how a film got made. Grew up downtown, and his mother's anti-chain-store politics shaped how he saw this movie as a kid.
Stances
Ephron's films are quietly experimental rather than generic
Fighting chains and protecting small bookstores shaped his view of the film
Actors' craft stories (Kinnear's ending, the Lalo scene) are the heart of the movie
Humor: Self-deprecating, bit-driven; owns his fumbled bits on mic.
In their words
“I fucked up the bit that we were trying to do, which is I am confident in the fact that he lived in England and him being from the Upper West Side surprises me.” (0:25:05)
“my mom's entire life that she was bringing my brother and I into was all about, like, we have to fight like Banana Republic.” (0:22:33)
“Hanks was saying he was pulling his hair out and he couldn't make sense of the Lalo scene” (1:41:52)
Loves the box office game and can recall almost any weekend from release dates; has a childhood devotion to Snow Day, Chris Elliott and Vin Diesel. Researches the filmography (Keaton's directing career, IMDb trivia) and likes the idea of a movie being a family or sibling reference point. Hates cable-edited versions of films on streaming sites.
Stances
Hanging Up does not cohere; each actress seems to be in a different movie
The last 20 minutes with the sisters together is where the juice is
Mourns the loss of varied theatrical box office weekends
Cable-edited streaming versions are unacceptable
Humor: Mock-obsessive precision about trivia (taglines, grosses, release weekends) delivered with self-deprecation.
In their words
“It is the only thing that gives me grounding in my life.” (1:31:35)
“Well, now I'm telling you, you motherfuckers should be watching Snow Day.” (1:23:33)
“I still found it not as bad as watching Braveheart on Pluto.” (1:15:18)
“I wish this had been the entire movie.” (0:27:31)
He is ready to submit to a silly pop-up and treat the staff with respect, and he reads the movie's plot and cast aloud with relish. He plays along with the Quibi bit and loves a long gag.
Stances
Staff of the experience deserve credit
The film is less palatable than the experience
Humor: He builds long deadpan bits, such as the Downton Abbey cast working the Trolls pop-up.
In their words
“Let me go step by step, okay?” (0:12:32)
“Now, we, of course, did this in the correct order because” (0:08:43)
Loves puppetry and practical creature design (Jabba, Yoda, the rancor), the speeder chase, and Wicket the Ewok. Dislikes the special-edition CGI additions and the Max Rebo band number, and wants Han and Leia to have real jobs in the third act. A sucker for a gag that gets dragged across the whole commentary.
Stances
Jabba's palace is the favorite stretch of any Star Wars film
Han and Leia are sidelined after the Ewoks arrive
Lucas's special-edition changes are weak and goofy
He is hosting a final Star Wars farewell to the Big Nice room
Humor: Escalating callback bits and absurd impressions, undercutting his own sentimental turns.
In their words
“I just, I fucking love puppetry, David.” (0:46:55)
“This my least favorite thing that he did.” (0:15:45)
Loves chaos picks and big swings (Judi Dench in Cats, Rebecca Ferguson in Doctor Sleep), cats and Pain and Glory are tangled up in his head, and he champions Portrait/Parasite/Us. Skeptical of Toy Story 4 going in. A sucker for movie-star arrival performances and the Fast & Furious franchise.
Stances
Cats is a real favorite, 'A slash F'
Removed Farewell and Her Smell from his own consideration because of friendships
Best original/adapted screenplay should include genre swings like Glass
Humor: Self-deprecating, riffs on running bits (Forky, nicknames like Florence Candice LeBron Bergen Pugh) and escalating panic over the F9 trailer.
In their words
“Best comedic performance of 2019, Little Women.” (0:12:56)
“I'm genuinely having a panic attack waiting for this trailer, so I'm ending this episode right now.” (1:41:14)
Loves Endgame, can be talked around on Infinity War after a rewatch, adores comics history (Kirby, Fourth World), fan-casting games and Marvel trivia. Can't stand corporate killing-off-characters-as-meaning,, and actors' craft. A sucker for the Avengers theme and big crowd-pleasing hero moments.
Stances
Infinity War frustrated him in theaters but he came around after Endgame
Wants characters' deaths to carry real emotional follow-through
Joaquin Phoenix and Cumberbatch contrast shows how green screen needs trained actors
Doctor Strange has the worst jokes in Marvel
Humor: Rapid-fire riffing and bits, and self-aware pop-culture asides.
In their words
“I love Endgame.” (0:27:58)
“I was perfectly wrong.” (2:28:18)
Their shows' recurring bits
Running bits, not opinions; a critic read aloud is cited, not present.
The Big Picture
Drafts: Hosts and guests draft films in rounds; every pick is a recommendation with an argument.
Hall of Fame: A star's or director's best, ranked and argued.
Countdowns: Ranked lists, top five or top ten.
Blank Check with Griffin & David
The box office game: Guessing the film's opening weekend and what it was up against.
The sung theme: "Blank Check with Griffin and David", sung; the transcriber garbles it.
Their claims
Showing 401–500 of 1,162 claims.
contrast (unexplained-setup contrast):
Masters of the Universe → Big.
Big reaches its magic machine in under ten minutes with no backstory, which the movie should have emulated instead of over-explaining.
“And there is no backstory of who made the machine or why or why it's possessed with a ghost or why it works or how to undo it.”
“like, it felt like a very kind of unoriginal list, but I couldn't talk myself into saying like, well, actually, BeastMaster has some really cool effects in it”
theme (borderline-genre):
Ray Harryhausen → The 7th Voyage of Sinbad.
Harryhausen movies blur Greek mythology and high fantasy; one of Sinbad or Jason would represent them.
“I could put the 7th Voyage of Sinbad on a list like this, you know?”
lineage (toy origin):
The Many Adventures of Winnie the Pooh → A.A. Milne.
Pooh stories are tales adapted from a mythology a boy created for his toys; the film's framing device shows a boy's room of dolls.
“They are tales adapted from The mythology created by kids for their toys.”
unmapped (canon filler):
The Hudsucker Proxy → Toy Story franchise.
To make a good toy-movie canon you have to cheat and include movies not driven by a product: Winnie the Pooh, Toy Story, Hudsucker.
“In order to make a cannon that is good. You have to cheat and put in things like Winnie the Pooh, Toy Story, and the Hudsucker proxy”
verdict (ranking):
Barbie → The Lego Movie.
Of the whole toy-movie canon, only Barbie and The Lego Movie came from a cynical place and ended somewhere fairly pure.
“And then you're like, really, it's only Barbie and Lego movie that came from the cynical place and ended up somewhere fairly pure.”
career (career):
José Padilha → Elite Squad.
Padilha comes from a gritty, stripped-down neo-realist police-force background, so the studio hired him for a serious reboot.
“this is the director who comes from a sort of like gritty kind of, uh, stripped down neo-realist”
programming (programming):
Darren Aronofsky → RoboCop.
Aronofsky was first choice, stayed three years, then left because MGM could not fund the film, the start of his flirtations with franchises.
contrast (contrast):
RoboCop → RoboCop.
In the original, Murphy loses his identity and must rediscover it; here he never does, and the host calls that stupid.
career (career):
Gary Oldman → Batman Begins.
Oldman's Gordon role changed his career after a stretch as a studio villain, and RoboCop asks him to play Gordon again without the mustache.
“He's just kind of Gordon without a mustache being like, Robocop, I'm really trying to help you here.”
contrast (contrast):
RoboCop → RoboCop.
A remake that pushes seriousness and cuts the humor, though the humor is what people remember about the original.
“you're like, huh, because the humor's the stuff that people remember.”
people (people):
José Padilha → Fernando Meirelles.
Meirelles said Padilha told him making RoboCop was the worst experience of his life, with nine of every ten ideas cut.
craft (craft):
RoboCop → RoboCop.
The original's way of showing the conversion was good, but the remake skips the time lapse and wakes him already built.
“the way they did it was really a good way to do it.”
craft (craft):
Legacy Effects → The Tick.
The shop that holds the RoboCop suits also did a lot of the effects work on The Tick, which the speaker knows from working on that show.
“I just know legacy effects who did a lot of stuff on the tick.”
craft (craft):
Legacy Effects → RoboCop.
After the first suit photos went over badly, the production gave Legacy Effects about two weeks to build a second suit closer to the 1987 look, per what the shop told the speaker.
“the production panicked when the 1st photos came out and the response was so bad and we were given like 2 weeks to make a new suit that looked more like the 80s movie”
lineage (lineage):
RoboCop → Batman Begins.
The remake is part of the grounded-and-serious wave that followed Nolan; the speakers say this film marks the end of it.
lineage (lineage):
RoboCop → Casino Royale.
Filmmakers sell the remake as the Casino Royale or Batman Begins of RoboCop while the Easter eggs sneer at the original.
career (career):
RoboCop → Chi-Raq (transcribed 'Shyraq').
Jackson's direct-address monologues here recall Chi-Raq, where he has fun as a meta narrator; here he is muzzled.
“Samuel Jackson has a character who similarly is doing like direct address to the camera monologues, right?”
contrast (contrast):
RoboCop → RoboCop.
Keaton's villain stays the same until a rooftop face-off; the speakers imagine Ronny Cox's version in his place.
“if Michael Keaton is fucking Ronnie Cox, you know. The movie like doesn't have a villain.”
programming (programming):
Resident Evil (film series) → Paul W.S. Anderson.
The next series is the Paul W.S. Anderson-involved Resident Evil films, all six, then Welcome to Raccoon City.
industry (industry):
Edge of Tomorrow → Mr. & Mrs. Smith.
Bourne, Smith and Edge all had the 'is he ever going to finish' chaos, with actors replaced mid-shoot.
“Bourne and Smith and Edge of Tomorrow all had that thing of like, is he ever going to finish this thing?”
career (career):
Edge of Tomorrow → American Made.
Edge is the end of the run where Cruise looks like an aged-well human; by American Made he looks 'nuts'.
contrast (contrast):
Edge of Tomorrow → Cocktail.
Unlike Cocktail or The Color of Money, Cruise's character does not have all the moves; he has to learn them.
contrast (contrast):
Edge of Tomorrow → The Color of Money.
Same point: the earlier Cruise plays the guy who has the moves; Edge has him work for them.
theme (theme):
Edge of Tomorrow → Groundhog Day.
Both are about depression and being stuck; Edge adds the stakes that you keep dying, and it stays hopeful.
“Groundhog Day, I would say is also like about depression.”
contrast (contrast):
Edge of Tomorrow → Groundhog Day.
Groundhog Day hits an inflection point where Bill Murray tries suicide and then just lives through it; Edge is about repeated violent deaths and the hope of advancing.
“Groundhog Day hits the inflection point about halfway through where he's like, let me kill myself.”
people (people):
Christopher McQuarrie → Edge of Tomorrow.
McQuarrie joined halfway through filming, connected the dots, and became the writer on set; he then got Mission Impossible.
“They hire Macquarie like halfway through filming and he immediately looks at what they have and starts like connecting dots and solving problems.”
career (career):
Doug Liman → Chaos Walking.
After Edge, Liman never got another good one; Chaos Walking went through reshoots and recasting and came out years late.
“chaos walking is going back for its 4th round of reshoots and recastings”
what-if (what-if):
Emily Blunt → Iron Man 2.
Fox kept Blunt in Gulliver's Travels instead of letting her be Black Widow in Iron Man 2 and the Avengers.
“Then John Favreau was like, I want you to play Black Widow and Iron Man 2”
what-if (what-if):
Emily Blunt → Get Him to the Greek.
Blunt dropped out of Get Him to the Greek; Rose Byrne replaced her and entered the Apatow system, leaving Blunt in a middle zone until Edge.
“They replaced her with Rose Byrne, who then gets properly fed into the Appatau system”
verdict (verdict):
Edge of Tomorrow → Jumper.
Same director, similar practical-effect obsession; Jumper has a good idea and a bad story, Edge solves it.
“you're like, he figured out this one thing and the story sucks.”
craft (craft):
Doug Liman → Jumper.
Liman's tactile, cable-pulled approach on Jumper's teleports prefigures the practical exosuits in Edge, a classic Liman obsession that here paid off.
“You're like classic Lyman mistake, except they solve it”
industry (industry):
Edge of Tomorrow → Snabba Cash.
Dragomir Mrsic from Edge is in Snabba Cash, the Swedish film that got Joel Kinnaman English-language work and Espinosa the RoboCop remake.
“It's the thing that got Joel Kinnaman in English language productions, and then Daniel Espinoza gets hired to do the Robocop remake”
craft (craft):
Edge of Tomorrow → Monsters, Inc..
The ambiguous final beat mirrors Monsters Inc.: you want to know he goes back to her but no more definitive answer.
“the perfect ending because it's like the Monsters Inc. ending”
what-if (what-if):
Doug Liman → Tom Cruise.
Liman and Cruise announced a film shot in space; it was canceled because Cruise didn't want to owe Trump a favor.
“the space movie is finally like officially fucking canceled”
contrast (contrast):
Million Dollar Arm → Trouble with the Curve.
Two baseball-coded movies from that era: Trouble with the Curve is the Eastwood one, Million Dollar Arm the Hamm one.
contrast (contrast):
Eraserhead → Dances with Wolves.
Dances with Wolves is argued to be a rough draft of what Costner figured out later despite winning Best Picture.
“this is a rough draft for what he fucking figured out later, even though the world responded to it at the time as masterpiece.”
contrast (contrast):
Eraserhead → Edward Scissorhands.
Eraserhead is the same outsider idea as Edward Scissorhands in raw form, where Burton's film was reworked into a presentable studio picture.
“And this is him just doing the pure raw expression version of basically the same idea.”
lineage (lineage):
David Lynch → Henry Mancini.
Lynch as a child liked the music of Henry Mancini; the speaker then jokes none of these influences show in his work.
people (people):
David Lynch → Jack Fisk.
Fisk, the production designer who plays the Man in the Planet, is the other big friend Lynch made in high school.
“Uh, the other big uh, friend that he makes in high school. Jack Fisk.”
craft (craft):
David Lynch → Herbert Cardwell.
Lynch says the original cinematographer was a genius who helped him understand making movies and lighting.
“Lynch says he was a genius who helped him understand everything about making movies, like he knew how to light what he did”
craft (craft):
Eraserhead → Twin Peaks.
Lynch still relates emotions through images the way Eraserhead does, which the speaker saw again in Twin Peaks: The Return.
craft (craft):
Come Out and Play → Makinov.
The masked, pseudonymous Makinov is credited with director, cinematographer, editor, sound department, producer and writer on Come Out and Play, his only credit.
“He is credited as director, cinematographer, editor, sound department producer, and writer.”
what-if (what-if):
The 13th Warrior → Greg Nicotero.
With two reshoot units and a tripled budget, nobody thought to hire Greg Nicotero for creature looks, so the monsters stay men in bear suits.
“no one's like, hey, maybe hire Greg Nicatero and come with a couple cool looks.”
lineage (adaptation scope):
The Killer (graphic novel) → The Killer.
The film takes almost everything from the first 200-odd pages of the comic; the series ran on to 2018.
“it feels like everything from the movie is basically taken from the 1st 200 some odd pages”
fun, about
Hanging Up:
Delia Ephron, overheard in a theater, said Keaton ruined the best thing she would write (told by Bobby on the You've Got Mail episode).
fun, about
Diane Keaton:
Keaton's directing career before Hanging Up: Belinda Carlisle videos, a documentary, and a CBS special with a very sensitive title.
“it has the very, very sensitive title of the girl with the crazy brother.”
fun, about
Terry Windell:
Terry Wendell (Windell) made Palpatine's lightning and the next year Ghostbusters' proton streams; the speaker's colleague on a show, who died days after wrapping.
“Terry Wendell is the visual effects artist who did Palpatine's lighting.”
fun, about
Star Wars: Episode VI – Return of the Jedi:
May 1983 box office: Jedi opened number one, ahead of Blue Thunder, Flashdance, Breathless, Tootsie, in a quiz format.
fun, about
Blankies host:
No one wants to host the Blankies; the planned host was Shane Gillis until he 'pushed too many boundaries'; the 'metaphor doesn't track' because you don't miss a boundary when pushing.
fun, about
Judi Dench in Cats:
Judi Dench's Cats performance: pure presence and commitment to something ridiculous; looks the most ridiculous of anyone.
“It is pure presence and pure commitment to something that is ridiculous.”
fun, about
Pain and Glory and the Cats trailer:
Griffin walked out of Pain and Glory and watched the Cats trailer on his phone in the hallway, then found a sandwich.
“walked out of that screaming and the cats trailer had dropped.”
fun, about
Ludacris at the F9 livestream:
While recording, the hosts watch the F9 trailer livestream concert; Ludacris performs, wearing a 'fake moon landing' shirt.
“Ludacris is wearing a shirt that says fake moon landing, no stars in the sky.”
fun, about
Fast & Furious 9 livestream:
While recording, Griffin keeps checking the F9 trailer livestream; he is 'genuinely having a panic attack waiting for this trailer'.
“I'm genuinely having a panic attack waiting for this trailer, so I'm ending this episode right now.”
fun, about
Avengers: Infinity War:
Opening ritual: the hosts try to start the film in sync with a Thanos snap, botching the remote and resetting twice.
“David, I'm going to go three, two, one, and then I want you to do a Thanos snap.”
fun, about
Benedict Wong:
Wong once attended a Blank Check taping, then flew to New York on Robert Downey Jr.'s private jet while Downey went to see the Grateful Dead; he and Peter Serafinowitz met in West End Star Trek Live.
“They appeared in a West End production of Star Trek Live”
fun, about
Robert Downey Jr.:
Griffin recalls Downey's baffling Instagram video announcing a Rolling Stones and NASA collaboration, in front of a 1997 screensaver.
“Have you guys seen the video of Robert Downey Jr. announcing the collaboration between The Rolling Stones and NASA?”
fun, about
Avengers theme:
Griffin plays the Avengers theme to feel confident before shows and auditions and imagines himself part of an end-credit scene.
“I listen to the Avengers theme and I walk down the streets of New York City and I think that like I'm part of an end credit scene.”
fun, about
Stellan Skarsgard:
In the Greenwich scene, Selvig is naked again in the no-pants zone; the speakers joke he must have written a nude clause into his Marvel deal.
fun, about
Frigga:
Frigga's Viking funeral, defended as the movie taking itself seriously; Portman later wears Frigga's dress, which the speaker says makes zero size sense.
fun, about
Heimdall:
Heimdall guards the rainbow bridge alone; the speakers debate what podcasts he'd listen to: not Comedy Bang, more S-Town or documentary.
fun, about
Benicio del Toro:
The Collector mid-credits scene: Benicio del Toro as Space Nesia whispers 'don't tell anybody'; the speakers imagine his demands on the Guardians ride.
“It's weird also that in this scene he leans in and goes, don't tell anybody.”
fun, about
Joss Whedon:
Whedon's pitch meeting: said the Zak Penn script was garbage; also told Downey it's a team movie with Cap leading, no Iron Man movie.
fun, about
Mark Ruffalo:
Ruffalo's career: Lonergan breakout, dropped out of Signs with an ear tumor, rom-com rut ('the mailman'), then Zodiac, Oscar nomination, and the Avengers call.
fun, about
Mark Ruffalo:
His agent told him to look out the window at 5:30 AM; a black car meant Comic-Con and the announcement as the Hulk, hours later.
“if there's a black car parked outside, it's to take you to the airport to go to Comic-Con.”
fun, about
Hulk:
See the scene where Banner reveals he shot himself and the Hulk spat the bullet out; he stays calm by always being angry (1:12:30, then 1:54:08 payoff).
“He shot himself in the head and he turned into the Hulk and the Hulk spit the bullet out.”
fun, about
Phil Coulson:
Coulson dies at about 1:25 with his Captain America cards bloodied; Griffin notes Clark Gregg returns for Captain Marvel's 1990s setting.
“Phil Colson worshiped him so much with the blood on them.”
fun, about
Hawkeye:
Hawkeye can run out of arrows (2:00-2:03) and Griffin hates knowing it; see the 'Vulture' stopwatch article claiming only six minutes of Hawkeye screen time.
“poor Hawkeye only has like 6 minutes of screen time.”
fun, about
Griffin Newman:
Griffin was a 90-pound mono-recovering actor who ate four cheeseburgers and a milkshake at the Disney store lunch break to gain mass and wondered why he didn't get the part.
“I would buy 4 cheeseburgers in a milkshake, and I would down it in 20 minutes”
fun, about
Zola (the reasonable Nazi):
Griffin's complaint: Zola is the voice of reason while Red Skull is cartoonish; he wants the evil doctor to cackle, not question atomizers as inhumane.
fun, about
Merchandise:
Production started so late that toys and binders were made from concept art, so Cap merchandise shows the wrong costume with the helmet still on, and Red Skull has a black nose.
“A, all of the Captain American merchandise for this movie has the wrong costume.”
fun, about
Thor:
See the opening Thor-throws-his-coffee-mug-on-the-ground scene; Ben calls it the best part of the movie.
“He throws his coffee on the ground.”
Blank Check — Patreon ·
Thor ·
0:01:51 ·
Griffin Newman
(0.40 sure it was them)
fun, about
Anthony Hopkins:
Hopkins reportedly took Odin because he circled every scene with NAR, no acting required; the bit gets tied to Blank Check's lexicon of River of Ham.
“I read the script, and every scene, I just circled it and wrote NAR, and I went, I'm on board”
Blank Check — Patreon ·
Thor ·
0:09:03 ·
Griffin Newman
(0.45 sure it was them)
fun, about
Kenneth Branagh:
River of Ham: Ray Stevenson fears dipping his toe in the river of ham and Branagh tells him to take a swim; the hosts include it in the Blank Check lexicon.
“I bathed in that river many times.”
Blank Check — Patreon ·
Thor ·
0:15:16 ·
Griffin Newman
(0.40 sure it was them)
fun, about
Thor:
See the Hawkeye cameo: Jeremy Renner perched in a crow's nest deliberating whether to shoot Thor, never speaking to him, clearly shot on a day no one else worked.
“Isn't it just clear that Renner came in on a day when no one else was working?”
Blank Check — Patreon ·
Thor ·
1:00:04 ·
Griffin Newman
(0.40 sure it was them)
fun, about
Stellan Skarsgard:
A long running bit: the hosts hunt the internet for Skarsgard nudity, ending on a site they say tells you which minute to watch of each movie, and an unused plan to have listeners tweet at Ben.
“Hey, if you can find the pean, hashtag, uh, find the pean for Ben.”
Blank Check — Patreon ·
Thor ·
1:17:40 ·
Griffin Newman
(0.50 sure it was them)
fun, about
Thor:
Natalie Portman and Hemsworth kiss at an impossible height, with her seeming to stand on 17 ladders; the hosts wish for the wide shot or a canted angle with Hemsworth bending 90 degrees.
“Allie Portman is standing on 17 ladders.”
Blank Check — Patreon ·
Thor ·
1:33:51 ·
Griffin Newman
(0.40 sure it was them)
fun, about
Thor:
Rene Russo gets one moment with a big sword and almost no lines as Frigga; Dark World gives her more.
“She doesn't have much to do in this.”
Blank Check — Patreon ·
Thor ·
1:34:35 ·
Griffin Newman
(0.35 sure it was them)
fun, about
A.O. Scott:
The hosts read A.O. Scott's Thor review opening about fleeing the IMAX into the velvet shadows of an art house, then Samuel L. Jackson's tweet telling fans he needs a new job.
“Avengers fans, New York Times critic AO Scott needs a new job.”
Blank Check — Patreon ·
Thor ·
1:36:38 ·
Griffin Newman
(0.50 sure it was them)
fun, about
Rio:
Rio killed Pixar's Newt: the trailer showed the same last-of-the-species-must-mate premise, so Pixar cancelled the film it announced.
“the Rio trailer came out and they were like, fuck, that's the same premise and they're going to beat us by 3 years.”
Blank Check — Patreon ·
Thor ·
1:53:22 ·
Griffin Newman
(0.40 sure it was them)
fun, about
Mickey Rourke:
Rourke's Chihuahua died right before filming; he allegedly made PAs hold up pictures of the dog and its belongings for the crying and screaming scenes.
“And he apparently would make PAs hold up pictures of his dog and like his dog's belongings for all these scenes where he's like crying and screaming.”
fun, about
Mickey Rourke:
Rumor of Rourke and Rockwell as the two villains played well, then Rourke trashed Marvel on the red carpet; the trailer was built around the Monte Carlo reveal of him.
“Maybe if those skinflints at Marvel open up their wallets a little bit.”
fun, about
The Tick:
Griffin's background-actor tale from The Tick: an extra twirling like Sound of Music in a happy crowd scene, and a recurring extra he called extra extra.
“And we called her extra extra because she did so much.”
fun, about
Ben Hosley:
Griffin posted a photo of Ben vaping; the replies ran from Colin Gossel to a good lounge-singer jazz album cover; it became a running gag.
fun, about
National Treasure:
Someone at Bruckheimer's office dropped pages of the unmade third film and a friend photographed the first three in a closet.
“a couple of the pages fell off and this friend like ran into like a closet and took photos of the 1st 3 pages”
fun, about
Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon:
Griffin and his dad disliked it at 11, but his memory of it kept improving: perfect recall played better and better.
“Sure. And my dad and I were both like, what's the fucking deal with that thing?”
fun, about
Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon:
The first fight: the whole first 35 minutes are people talking about how good Li Mu Bai is, then he shows up and it takes three moves.
“The entire 1st 35 minutes of the movie are people talking about how good he is at fighting.”